Boring Nice Guys
Dave Stone

That’s right, nice guys are boring and we girls don’t always want to be bored by our partners. On the other hand some nice guys, like my man are exciting. Sure he is reliable and dependable, he opens car doors for me, makes me coffee, would bring me breakfast in bed if I wanted it (which I never do) and even cooks when I don’t feel like doing it but when I wake up at 4 in the morning to find his tongue searching for my clit I know why I married that guy. Our social training makes us look for reliable and dependable guys but sometimes we need some excitement in our lives, we need to visit the dark side of our personality, we long for some danger and thrills, to give us a lift.

There are a couple of sites on the net that do cater for couples. Couples can get to those sites and enjoy the stories and fantasies together without having to hide the fact that you both are in need of hot steamy romance or wild sex. A lot of men and women may feel a tad inferior when it comes to looking at sexy couples, slim Jane pretzels, muscular hunks… please don’t ever feel this way… You are a normal person no matter what you may look like. I write this knowing it to be very true. I am a larger lady, a and many years ago I looked at myself thinking that I was not good in bed, was not a great lover and I put myself down because of my build… Not any more. I have a partner who understands me, who loves me for who I am and doesn’t expect me to look like Pamela Anderson. Apart from that with the work I do offline I see many men daily who love larger ladies…

So while you look at pictures and read stories about hot babes with great tits, remember that you too are that person regardless of your build… and guys remember too that you can be a great lover - size does not matter, it’s how you use it counts.
You may be asking what has this got to do with your relationship? It has a lot to do with it… Your personality, character, openness, your individuality are all part of your relationship with your partner.

Without forcing intimacy, partners can create opportunities to be closer to each other by arranging romantic interludes, but when doing this, you need to remember that if you have forgotten how to be romantic or out of the habit of doing it, then sometimes trying too hard for your fantasy to unfold can inadvertently lead to disappointment. To avoid disappointment talk to each other about your fantasies, tell your partner what turns you on, if you want to plan a romantic weekend away or a “date”, talk about it first. Then when you feel the time is right, one of you make the move by ringing and asking your partner out for a meal or perhaps plan a weekend away where instead of going together, you meet at the hotel.
When a relationship first begins, intimate moments happen like mysterious accidents, we stumble blindly together; we are tender, relaxed and we are passionate together; Does it wet your appetite for more? I believe it does, but sometimes relationships lose their way when it comes to being romantic, close and sexually fulfilled.

Talk to each other about what you feel makes for good and bad times, the factors that may influence how close you feel to each other could be hope, fear and the balance between quality time together and apart and how much you count on or rely on each other. Try to remember a good balance of quality time together and time apart builds both intimacy and individuality.
Creating lasting closeness means you need to rely on each other and to help each other fulfil dreams. Invest some of your time together discussing those hopes and dreams that you both have and can share.

True intimacy is one of the greatest experiences in life, how you create and nurture it though is the real challenge. It takes teamwork and openness from both of you to make it happen. While searching the Net I also came across an erotic questionnaire with 6 of the top answers and I thought I would share them with you. Let me know what you think and if you have any more answers let me know and I’ll post some of them next month along with other ideas on how to spice up your relationship… Don’t forget to read this carefully there are two ways suggested within this column and I know they work…

Erotic Questions and The Top 6 Answers:

Q: “Lately my partner seems uninterested in having sex with me. What can I do to “wow” him?”

A1: “We once made ice-cream sundaes on each other’s stomachs and ate them. The hot fudge and cold ice-cream together on your skin creates quite a sensation.”

A2: “Buy a cheap plastic shower curtain and a bottle of baby oil. Warm the oil in a hot water, and lay the curtain over your bed or on the living room floor. Squirt the oil all over the curtain and get naked!”

A3: “Gently tie and blindfold him while he lies on the bed. Stand at the side of the bed and lightly trail your fingers all over his body. Leave his genital area alone for as long as possible. When you deprive him of his sense of sight, his other sense will kick into overdrive.”

A4: “Every time we have any kind of sex, we put money in a jar. Oral sex gets a buck plus a quarter; a hand job gets a buck plus a dime; if she comes, it’s a buck plus a nickel; if we videotape it, it’s a buck plus a five-dollar bill. It’s a great incentive!”

A5: “My wife always does something unexpected. When I was tending bar, she got in an empty ice bin and started going down on me. It was fabulous - until I had to move to serve someone.”

A6: “Make your own movie with exactly what you want in it. Just make sure you lock it up tight when you’re done.”

Some of these things are so interesting, I think I might try some of them with my clients and partner. Until next month everyone… Enjoy your fantasies, experiment and live your dreams together…